Saturday, August 15, 2009

"I Hate My Job"

Got this from one of our local restaurants. ROFLMAO. Gotta share....

"My job is so fucking unbelievable. I’ll try to sum it up by first telling you about the folks I work with:
"First, there is this supermodel wanna-be chick. Yeah, okay, she is pretty hot, but damn is she completely useless. The girl is constantly fixing her hair or putting on makeup. She is extremely self-centered and has never once considered the needs or wants of anyone but herself. She is as dumb as a box of rocks, and I still find it surprising that she has enough brain power to continue to breathe.
"The next chick is completely the opposite. She might even be one of the smartest people on the planet. Her career oppertunities are endless, and yet she is here with us. She is a zero on a scale of 1 to 10. I’m not sure she even showers, much less shaves her “womanly” parts. I think she might be a lesbian, because every time we drive by the hardware store, she moans like a cat in heat.
"But the jewel of the crowd has got to be the fucking stoner. And this guy is more than just your average pothead. In fact, he is baked before he comes to work, during work, and I’m sure after work. He probably hasn’t been sober anytime in the last ten years, and he’s only 22. He dresses like a beatnik throwback from the 1960’s, and to make things worse, he brings his big fucking dog to work. Every fucking day I have to look at this huge Great Dane walk around half-stoned from the second-hand smoke. Hell, sometimes I even think it’s trying to talk with its constant bellowing. Also, both of them are constantly hungry, requiring multiple stops to McDonalds and Burger King, every single fucking day.
"Anyway, I drive these fucktards around in my van and we solve mysteries and shit."

Tuesday, June 23, 2009


I just applied to get my Master's!!! DH suggested it 3 days ago -- I discovered that the University of Auckland has a Master's program EXACTLY in my area of study (International Relations and Human Rights) -- I corresponded with the (American) program director -- and tonight I completed the app! The Director said that I should be easily admitted (I have a degree in IR, with an undergrad thesis in Human Rights, so that's kinda a shoe-in), so I'm not even worried about that. PLUS, University here is super cheap, so my Master's will only cost me about NZ$6000 (as opposed to that $100K USC education!!)

OOOh, I'm so excited...if I didn't have the worst cramps on the planet, I'd be jumping up and down!!!

P.S., OK, who's read the Twilight books?? The movie was so bad that I got sucked into the reading the entire series (in three days time) and I have desperately wanted to engage in an Academic discussion of the books, their morality/theology, and why, OH WHY, is it acceptable for authors to forget about grammar/good storyform just because they are writing for teens?? What? Teens don't need to learn how to use "whom" like the rest of us??....errrrrt, must stop oncoming punctuation rant.....And most of all, there should be a law against writers taking interesting plots and butchering them with poorly constructed stories....Now, I'm waiting for the Sookie Stackhouse novels to arrive......

Saturday, May 30, 2009

Some days I just want to chuck it all in...(Mini-rrrrant)

I'm having one of those weeks (thanks to hormones) when I just want to chuck the whole healthy-living, organic-eating, Waldorf homeschooling, supermom crap out the bloody window! I mean, don't we all have these days when we want to stick the kids in the local public school, spend a week getting our house REALLY (and I mean REALLY) clean, actually have all the grocery shopping completed and the meals cooked and the floors clean ALL AT THE SAME TIME??? When we can induldge in our cramps without feeling like a shitty mom because the kids sit in front of Mary Poppins all morning? I mean, I don't remember the last time my toenails were polished, and this coming from a girl who graduated from USC and always had perfect pedicures.

I'm not really going to change any of those things, because truly my life is wonderful and I am blessed to be able to live this way. BUT I do see the ways that I make our lives harder than the norm. And on these days, the thing that comes to mind most, that which Screams In My Ears, is "forget Waldorf!!" I actually really love Waldorf, but it can be so damned hard to be THAT mother. I had a wonderful discussion with a Waldorf advisor this week and she was talking about how important it is for the kids to see parents as the Rock - strong, stable, right, carrying the forms, etc. And I had to look at her and say that, in my experience, that just isn't possible for most homeschoolers. I mean, first off, we give up the second income that pays for the full-time babysitter or nanny; second, as immigrants, we have no grandparents or aunties to help, and DH goes to work. When I fall apart, or lose my cool, or sit crying for days because my grandmother died, my kids are right there with me. There is no school to ship them to, so that they can see Mommy being composed all the time. And today, as Biggie went to put clean FOLDED clothes into dirty clothes basket, I completely frigging lost my temper....because there is an element to homeschooling that turns us into 24hour a day slaves and the happy-happy- singsongness of Waldorf just ain't gonna cut it at all times!

There, I think I'm done. I'm just gonna stop there while the ranting is fresh and completed and I don't start dredging up other things to complain about.

Back to my silent blog.

Thursday, May 14, 2009

Great Vaccine Editorial

Ok, there is an academic part of me that cringes at the tho't of Jim Carrey as author of a noteworthy editorial (because, come on, don't we all remember Dumb and Dumber??). And even worse: this comes from The Huffington Post! All those tho'ts aside, I have become familiar with the work of Generation Rescue because of our office, and want as many people to read this article as possible. To that end, I share....

The Judgment on Vaccines Is In???
Jim Carrey
Posted April 22, 2009 10:02 AM (EST)

Recently, I was amazed to hear a commentary by CNN's Campbell Brown on the controversial vaccine issue. After a ruling by the 'special vaccine court' saying the Measles, Mumps, Rubella shot wasn't found to be responsible for the plaintiffs' autism, she and others in the media began making assertions that the judgment was in, and vaccines had been proven safe. No one would be more relieved than Jenny and I if that were true. But with all due respect to Ms. Brown, a ruling against causation in three cases out of more than 5000 hardly proves that other children won't be adversely affected by the MMR, let alone that all vaccines are safe. This is a huge leap of logic by anyone's standards. Not everyone gets cancer from smoking, but cigarettes do cause cancer. After 100 years and many rulings in favor of the tobacco companies, we finally figured that out.

The truth is that no one without a vested interest in the profitability of vaccines has studied all 36 of them in depth. There are more than 100 vaccines in development, and no tests for cumulative effect or vaccine interaction of all 36 vaccines in the current schedule have ever been done. If I'm mistaken, I challenge those who are making such grand pronouncements about vaccine safety to produce those studies.

If we are to believe that the ruling of the 'vaccine court' in these cases mean that all vaccines are safe, then we must also consider the rulings of that same court in the Hannah Polling and Bailey Banks cases, which ruled vaccines were the cause of autism and therefore assume that all vaccines are unsafe. Clearly both are irresponsible assumptions, and neither option is prudent.
In this growing crisis, we cannot afford to blindly trumpet the agenda of the CDC, the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) or vaccine makers. Now more than ever, we must resist the urge to close this book before it's been written. The anecdotal evidence of millions of parents who've seen their totally normal kids regress into sickness and mental isolation after a trip to the pediatrician's office must be seriously considered. The legitimate concern they and many in the scientific community have that environmental toxins, including those found in vaccines, may be causing autism and other disorders (Aspergers, ADD, ADHD), cannot be dissuaded by a show of sympathy and a friendly invitation to look for the 'real' cause of autism anywhere but within the lucrative vaccine program.

With vaccines being the fastest growing division of the pharmaceutical industry, isn't it possible that profits may play a part in the decision-making? That the vaccine program is becoming more of a profit engine than a means of prevention? In a world left reeling from the catastrophic effects of greed, mismanagement and corporate insensitivity, is it so absurd for us to wonder why American children are being given twice as many vaccines on average, compared to the top 30 first world countries?

Paul Offit, the vaccine advocate and profiteer, who helped invent a Rotavirus vaccine is said to have paved the way for his own multi-million dollar windfall while serving on the very council that eventually voted his Rotavirus vaccine onto our children's schedule. On August 21, 2000 a congressional investigation's report titled, "Conflicts in Vaccine Policy," stated:

It has become clear over the course of this investigation that the VRBPAC and the ACIP [the two main advisory boards that determine the vaccine schedule] are dominated by individuals with close working relationships with the vaccine producers. This was never the intent of the Federal Advisory Committee Act, which requires that a diversity of views be represented on advisory committees.

Isn't that enough to raise questions about the process of choosing the vaccine schedule?
With many states like Minnesota now reporting the number at 1 in 80 children affected with autism, can we afford to trust those who serve two masters or their logic that tells us "one size fits all" when it comes to vaccines? Can we afford to ignore vaccines as a possible cause of these rising numbers when they are one of the fastest growing elements in our children's environment? With all the doubt that's left hanging on this topic, how can anyone in the media or medical profession, boldly demand that all parents march out and give their kids 36 of these shots, six at a time in dosage levels equal to that given a 200 pound man? This is a bias of the most dangerous kind.

I've also heard it said that no evidence of a link between vaccines and autism has ever been found. That statement is only true for the CDC, the AAP and the vaccine makers who've been ignoring mountains of scientific information and testimony. There's no evidence of the Lincoln Memorial if you look the other way and refuse to turn around. But if you care to look, it's really quite impressive. For a sample of vaccine injury evidence go to

We have never argued that people shouldn't be immunized for the most serious threats including measles and polio, but surely there's a limit as to how many viruses and toxins can be introduced into the body of a small child. Veterinarians found out years ago that in many cases they were over-immunizing our pets, a syndrome they call Vaccinosis. It overwhelmed the immune system of the animals, causing myriad physical and neurological disorders. Sound familiar? If you can over-immunize a dog, is it so far out to assume that you can over-immunize a child? These forward thinking vets also decided to remove thimerosal from animal vaccines in 1992, and yet this substance, which is 49% mercury, is still in human vaccines. Don't our children deserve as much consideration as our pets?

I think I'd rather listen to the more sensible voice of Dr. Bernadine Healy, former head of the National Institute of Health, who says:

Listen to the patients and the patients will teach...I think there is an inexcusable issue, and that's the lack of research that's been done here...A parent can legitimately question giving a one-day old baby, or a two-day old baby [the] Hepatitis B vaccine that has no risk for it [and] the mother has no risk for it. That's a heavy-duty vaccine given on day two [of life]. I think those are legitimate questions.

Dr. Healy is also calling for a long overdue study of vaccinated vs. unvaccinated. Dr. Frank Engly, a researcher and microbiologist who served on the boards of the CDC, FDA and EPA during the 70s and 80s, warned:

The CDC cannot afford to admit thimerosal is toxic because they have been promoting it for several years...If they would have followed through with our 1982 report, vaccines would have been freed of thimerosal and all this autism as they tell me would not have occurred. But as it is, it all occurred.

In all likelihood the truth about vaccines is that they are both good and bad. While ingredients like aluminum, mercury, ether, formaldehyde and anti-freeze may help preserve and enhance vaccines, they can be toxic as well. The assortment of viruses delivered by multiple immunizations may also be a hazard. I agree with the growing number of voices within the medical and scientific community who believe that vaccines, like every other drug, have risks as well as benefits and that for the sake of profit, American children are being given too many, too soon. One thing is certain. We don't know enough to announce that all vaccines are safe!
If the CDC, the AAP and Ms. Brown insist that our children take twice as many shots as the rest of the western world, we need more independent vaccine research not done by the drug companies selling the vaccines or by organizations under their influence. Studies that cannot be internally suppressed. Answers parents can trust. Perhaps this is what Campbell Brown should be demanding and how the power of the press could better serve the public in the future.

-- Jim Carrey

Saturday, April 25, 2009

Random Dirty Humour

This comes from DH. Just too funny not to share. Beware, totally off-colour. Oh, and in NZ, "fanny" = vagina. (hahaha, fanny pack! don't say that in New Zealand!)

Miss you guys. Take care!

13 of the finest (unintentional) double-entendres ever aired on British TV and radio
1. Ted Walsh - Horse Racing Commentator - 'This is really a lovely horse. I once rode her mother.'
2. New Zealand Rugby Commentator - 'Andrew Mehrtens loves it when Daryl Gibson comes inside of him.'
3. Pat Glenn, weightlifting commentator - 'And this is Gregoriava from Bulgaria. I saw her snatch this morning and it was amazing!'
4. Harry Carpenter at the Oxford-Cambridge boat race 1977 - 'Ah, isn't that nice. The wife of the Cambridge President is kissing the Cox of the Oxford crew.'
5. US PGA Commentator - 'One of the reasons Arnie (Arnold Palmer) is playing so well is that, before each tee shot, his wife takes out his balls and kisses them ..... Oh my god !! What have I just said??'
6. Carenza Lewis about finding food in the Middle Ages on 'Time Team Live' said: 'You'd eat beaver if you could get it.'
7. A female news anchor who, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked, 'So Bob, where's that eight inches you promised me last night?' Not only did HE have to leave the set, but half the crew did too, because they were laughing so hard
8. Steve Ryder covering the US Masters: 'Ballesteros felt much better today after a 69 yesterday.'
9. Clair Frisby talking about a jumbo hot dog on 'Look North' said: 'There's nothing like a big hot sausage inside you on a cold night like this. '
10 Mike Hallett discussing missed snooker shots on 'Sky Sports': 'Stephen Hendry jumps on Steve Davis's misses every chance he gets.'
11. Michael Buerk on watching Philippa Forrester cuddle up to a male astronomer for warmth during BBC1's UK eclipse coverage remarked: 'They seem cold out there. They're rubbing each other and he's only come in his shorts.'
12. Ken Brown commentating on golfer Nick Faldo and his caddie Fanny Sunneson lining-up shots at the Scottish Open: 'Some weeks Nick likes to use Fanny; other weeks he prefers to do it by himself.'
13. Brian Johnstone - 1976 - commentating on the test match at The Oval "The batsman's Holding, the bowler's Willey.

Saturday, February 7, 2009

Since this IS a homeschooling blog

Aaah, quiet time.

My family has gone to the local Lantern Festival and, in a know-thyself kind of way, I abstained; I hate crowds and would have been a miserable old bag.

And since I do actually like blogging, this seemed like a perfect time to indulge in megalomaniacal sharing. But first let me go get a glass of wine (for real)....

Okay, I'm back. I'm drinking a nice Syrah that (no joke) is grown at my neighbour's vineyard. Let's just say, very eclectic neighbourhood!

So, school has been going marvelously this year. While we were in the States, we did next to nothing, so we started back to lessons in early January. DH and I decided that Biggie, despite her lack of toothiness, was in need of some more structured schooltime -- basically, we needed to institute a routine that will allow for formal learning. This has worked really well and has allowed me to meet her at her own learning level, while giving her the structure that her wee phlegmatic self desperately needs. Some days, we do nothing but paint and craft, but we have also finished a math block and a geography block.

This brings me to our curric choices. I really love Alan Whitehead, which puts me in a teeny-tiny minority! Alan recommends a three week block, and explains this with a variety of spiritual and practical reasons. In his "practical" category, he proposes that three weeks is neither too long nor too short, but just right. Hehe. Really, tho', it is short enough that the child who is disinterested can see the light at the end of the tunnel ("only two more weeks and then we're done...") and the child who loves the lesson is fulfilled and not burned out. For the hs'ing parent, it's a manageable timeframe to prep (and if you have designed a main lesson block, you know exactly what I mean!). Frankly, I think every homeschooler should give this a try, because it really works so well.

Next, geography? Well, Alan Whitehead proposes that a child be taught not only language arts and math, but also age appropriate geography and physics. For geography, it is taught from the child out. We completed a block during which we learned how to determine direction from the sun and the stars alone, using your body as a compass; from there, we created a block version of our house and oriented it to the sun; we walked all around our neighbourhood and, using a big piece of mdf and some monopoly houses, we created a diagram of our community. Biggie painted and position houses and roads, the ocean; she glued sand for beaches and built a tiny seesaw for the playground. The Zoo is in our neighbourhood, so we had a "field trip" and talked about how these animals didn't REALLY belong in our neighbourhood :-) !

We will begin a language arts block on Monday, and I have tailored it to Biggie's needs. Specifically, she needs to work on when to use capital versus minuscule letters, she needs to "remember" her spaces between words, and we need to discuss periods at the ends of sentences. For us, language means lots and lots of pictures, so I have created a story about a Roman emperor who needed miniscule letters because people were getting confused, etc. I will be cheating and recreating the pictures from The Waldorf Alphabet (my children have never actually seen this book, so why reinvent the wheel??).

And in March, we will introduce physics. Again, this is NOT physics like high school physics, but story based approach demanding characters use pulleys, levers, planes, floating rafts, etc., to solve a problem. We won't dare try to introduce all of these mechanisms, but will pick just a few (probably one from each realm).

So that's our homeschooling life. Right now, my kids are experiencing baby-nirvana, because we are running a mini-commune. Some Waldorf friends are in their last school term before returning to Germany and they are living in our downstairs flat. This means that all the kids (my two plus their three!) get to play together daily. Our friends go to the local Waldorf school, so they help my children remember how to storytell and play princesses and goblins, and they inspire the girls to fingerknit (and regular knit!) and eat the tomatoes directly off the vines. It is a fine time of life for my littlies, right now.

And now, I shall leave you to knit. I am working on a scrap buster which I have appropriately named "Therapy." Think, unencumbering.


Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Overheard in my backyard

Today, in our New Zealand backyard, I overheard the following conversation...

Biggie: Do you know how many people watched the American Presidential Election?
Group of 4 friends: No, how many?
Biggie: (with emphasis) TWO THOUSAND!
Group: No way!? That's alot.

I love their little world. Wouldn't it be nice to be young with them?